I'll start with the Heartache part. On Friday I was getting ready to celebrate the weekend with Stuart because he got the whole weekend off. We were heading out to Bob's Burger and Brew with his family and grandparents. Just as we were heading out Beki, my little sister popped up online and I jumped at the chance to talk to her because she doesn't have the internet in her flat and I hardly ever get to talk to her.
She said she had some news and I was scared. Last time she had something important to tell us she was 14 and pregnant. This time it turns out she's 19 and pregnant. With twins.
That there is my heartache.
Feelings of guilt, betrayal, anger and plain old confusion have been at me since then. There are 3 years between us and Beki has always been over-protective of me. I've always tried my best to be a good example to her and choose the right so she can see how happy it makes me. It never worked though. Beki never wanted to do things that would make her like me. She always got really angry when mum muddled our names up and called her "Laura". I had to accept her over-protecting me but she wouldn't let me protect her.
I was lead to believe though that we were best friends. Since she had Cameron I thought we really were best friends. I stuck by her and helped her when a lot of other people were talking about her behind her back and abandoning her. It was hard for me because the things I hate most is being lied to. We worked it out though and are grateful to have Cameron in our lives. He's amazing.
Through conversations we've had in the past few years I thought she was doing alright and making things better but that was just what she wanted me to think.
So here I am and there she is. All I want is the best for her. I want her to be happy and I want to be her best friend.
On to Backaches...
(For Uncle John) My injury is a Lumbar sub-luxation. I partially dislocated my spine.
I passed my drug test (see "Urine Luck") and was able to start work on Monday. Today is Tuesday and I'm not at work. I'm lonely.
I went to work on Monday and 35 minutes into the work day I had to go have a wee sit down. I worked slowly with the help of my loyal Jansport pals who kindly brought me boxes to work on so I didn't have to lift anything. I went home at 10am. Everyone else was sent home at 2nd break so I didn't feel too guilty leaving them.
At 3pm yesterday I went to see Bill jr. His technique is different than his brother's. He asked how that went and I told him his brother killed me. We had a laugh about that and then he saw the bruises on my back. I just figured he left the dirty work to his brother because I'm always telling him that I don't want to cry or scream or be hurt and he didn't have the heart to do it himself. Oh well.
I think Jansport regrets hiring me. They might even want me to quit.
Oh, my 10 year green card arrived on Friday too.