Tuesday, February 5, 2008

The Breast Pump...

I'm quite sure I didn't post this before so here it is for your amusement (and for my journal).

When: August 2007
Where: Andrew's old bedroom

A little background on this story is that for Beki's 15th birthday all she wanted was a new mobile phone.­ She really wanted one of those slider/flip phones.­ She asked me if I knew if she was getting one.­ I did know.­ She was getting a phone.­ I told her she was but only so she wouldn't hurt mum and dad's feelings when she opened it in front of them.­ I told her money was tight and they did their best.­ She was naturally curious and little anxious to know what that meant.­ I told her they got her a phone and it was a flip/slider one but it was HUGE.­ Like a brick.­ They couldn't afford a little one.­ I told her she probably couldn't even fit the sucker in her pocket it was so big.­ She was sad but, bless her she is kind.­ I told her she had to practice her surprised face so I wouldn't get into trouble for telling her.­

For about 2 weeks she practiced looking surprised and happy -­ she wasn't very good at it but still, she tried.­She opened her present on her birthday and it was the phone she'd wanted.­ Haha.­ It was a little slider phone and mum and dad had done such a good job.­ She was really nervous to open it though.­ It was hilarious.­.­.­.­

Fast forward 5 years to the month of her wedding.­ She was able to get a beautiful dress but couldn't afford much else.­ Aunt Wilma had spoken to mum and found out there was veil that matched her dress that she really wanted but couldn't afford it.­ Mum told Aunt Wilma the name of the Dress Shop and Auntie Wilma phoned it and bought the veil as a surprise.­I wasn't sure when she was going to be given the veil so I asked her if she'd gotten her present from Aunt Wilma yet.

­"No, what is it?" she asked.­ I wasn't going to tell her.

­"Tell me.­ You know I can make a surprised face!"

I almost died when she brought up the mobile phone story.­ Why would she even trust me to tell her what she got from that whole experience? I have no idea.­ I still refused to tell her.­ Then she got the idea that she'd guess and if she was right she'd know it by looking at my face.­

Her first guess was something ridiculous.­ Her second guess was even more ridiculous and I couldn't help smiling.­ She thought she'd guessed it right.­ A breast pump.­

I think I said something like "Yeah, Beki.­ Aunt Wilma bought you a breast pump as a wedding present!"

She thought I was telling her she was right instead of trying to make her hear how daft that sounded.­

"A BREAST PUMP! Are you serious?!".­.­.­ I then realised how brilliant the idea was.­ It'd get her off my back and I wouldn't have to tell her what she really got.­ I explained that being pregnant with twins meant that Aunt Wilma probably thought she could really use a breast pump.­ Beki agreed that it would probably be a good idea but she didnt like the idea of it.­ I told her it was one of those fancy new electric kind and that it would be really useful for her.­.­.­.­

This went on for days.­ "A breast pump?" She'd ask.

­I told mum what was going on so she knew Beki was expecting a breast pump.­ It was so funny.­ I told Stuart -­ who enjoyed being a part of it since he was the butt of the glass eye incident.­ Dad found out and probably just thought we were silly.­

A couple of days before the wedding I think mum had been talking to Aunt Wilma on the phone and came in when she was done.­ Beki told her that she'd guessed what Aunt Wima had got her as a gift.­

Dad asked, "how could you guess that?".­

Beki then went on to inform us all that, "I'm just a really good guesser.­ It's a gift.­ I'm ace!" and then, "Don't give Laura into trouble.­ She didn't tell me but she can't lie to me and could tell by her face that it was a breast pump.­"

We were all dying.­The morning of the wedding mum wanted to give Beki the present from Aunt Wilma.­ Beki wasn't too excited until...


Tracy Ngu said...

You have the best stories!!

Dustin said...

LOL! That was awesome!

Chiemi said...

Crud I posted at Dustin! Sorry about that!

Daniello Dello said...

I love this story!! This one is going with all the stories I'm collecting for my family history notebook! Hehe this is fun.

Courtney said...

I love it!!!! Im happy crying over your family story- something must be wrong w/ me :)

Kizzie and Andy said...

Oh my gosh, that was the funniest thing ever!! You tell storied so well!! I was seriously laughing the whole time I read it! good thing no one else was around, I probably seemed pretty retarded!!

Tell us some more of your funny family stories!!