Wednesday, March 4, 2009

That fear thing...

Most of my friends know about my fear of being forgotten. I've been thinking about it recently and why it's such a strong fear.

We've been here for 4 years. Every summer we leave and then come back in the autumn. Over that break things happen, life goes on and then we come back and expect it to be the same as we left it. The same people are here but they aren't the same.  We were friends before we left and then when we come back for some reason we're not friends anymore. It's sad and it's happened so many times.

We've met people that became good friends really quickly. We've spent time together almost every day. We've spoken about living close to one another. We've shared countless meals and so much time together and then they leave and that's it. Or we leave for the summer and that's it.

How can things change so quickly? I don't expect to be friends with absolutely everyone I ever meet. I also don't expect to be friends with friends forever but sometimes things click and you expect it to stay clicked forever.

I'm sad for the loss of strong friendships.

Now it's our turn to leave. I really hope I can still give the kind of friendship I expect from people even though we won't be in the same town. 

Don't forget me, y'hear?!

(If you feel my posts are lacking in photographic entertainment, which it is, take a gander here.)


Megan said...

That's interesting that you have that fear--not interesting as in strange, but interesting just because I just usually assume that I am forgotten. Sad.

Chiemi said...

I know how you feel. Being forgotten is such a sad thing. Makes a person feel so lonely!

Keri said...

I understand!! We moved back into the same ward we were in before we moved to Rexburg and it's different now. Some people that we were really good friends with we hardly talk to now...but we have also made other new good friends. I won't forget you :)

Laura said...

Megan: That sucks but think of it like this - you have a way to communicate with anyone you want, whenever you want - cell phone, email, etc... Do you put in as much effort to remember others as you expect/would like in return?
You have the chance to be around a lot of people every single day. I think my trial through this is being happy with being remembered by the one person who sees me everyday.
And those aren't lecture questions I just asked, those are just things I've been thinking about for myself too. Worth a think though.

Chiemi: It is sad but how do we really know that we've been forgotten? Do you know what I mean? I think we do it to ourselves mostly.

Keri: It's funny how we all feel forgotten and have those same experiences at times. I think that proves we're never really alone.

Megan Marie said...

Like your link. That's about all the photographic entertainment anybody could handle. PS I can't forget you, even when I try.

Jon and Sarah Jackson Family said...

We have been gone almost a year and I still think about you every week when I know we would be getting together to have our little chat if we were still there.
It's scary to move on, but at the same time it is liberating. I hate thinking that maybe I didn't effect anyone enough to remember me longer than a month. I am so self-conscious it is rediculous. If there is one thing I have learned about moving away so many times, it's that it really doesn't matter what other people think of me. I could sit here forever and wonder if people like me, or if they remember me, or if they even give a darn I'm gone. But when all is said and done, it's not the amount of people that remember me, it's the reason they (however many) remember me. I hope they remember me as someone who tried to be friends with anyone who was in need of a friend. I hope they remember me as someone who was happy and loved to serve.
I know I remember you not because of your awesome Scottishness, but because we shared moments where you gave me what I needed and I hopefully gave you what you needed at the time (whether it be a hug, a chat, a treat, or a prank.:)I miss you and I know that I will never forget you. So there's one thing you don't have to be afraid of anymore. :)

Rachel said...

I know we don't talk much anymore...but i think about you often! I like this post. I think most people secretly feel the same.